Tough Love

A long time ago, on the radio program Focus on the Family, I remember Pastor James Dobson mentioning the term tough love.  That memory came to mind today while I was having a conversation with three sisters whom I met for the first time.  Perhaps the reason it resurfaced was that we were discussing family matters—particularly how we, as parents, should love our children—and sharing our concerns and thoughts on the subject.  When I mentioned to them that as parents, we sometimes need to show tough love to our children, one of the sisters responded by saying that she had considered loving her children unconditionally (just as God loves us unconditionally) but had never really thought about the need for tough love before.  In response, I explained that while God does indeed love us unconditionally, His love is also a tough love.  For example, just as God led the Israelites into the wilderness during the Exodus, He sometimes leads us into the wilderness to humble us and to teach us that man does not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God (Deuteronomy 8:2).  Therefore, I believe that when we love our children, we must maintain balance. God’s love includes both unconditional love and tough love.  In the same way, we must love our children with that balance.