A family is not a place where a husband and wife demand

what they want from each other.

A family is not a place where a husband and wife demand what they want from each other.  However, we often find ourselves expecting our spouse to fulfill our own desires.  What is the problem?  It stems from misunderstanding the purpose of the family—not as a place to meet each other's needs, but as a place to demand personal wants.

If a wife constantly demands from her husband, and the husband likewise keeps demanding from his wife, such a family will be plagued with dissatisfaction, conflict, and arguments.  However, if a couple views their family as a wilderness—a place of mutual dedication—they will focus not on demanding their desires but on meeting each other's needs with commitment and care.

When a husband strives to understand his wife’s needs more deeply and seeks to meet those needs with Christ-like love, the wife will feel God’s love through him.  Similarly, when a wife grows in understanding her husband’s needs and acknowledges his authority, submitting to him as the Church submits to Christ, listening to and following his guidance, the husband will be strengthened by the grace that God provides through her.  In this way, the couple will experience their needs being met through one another, leading to a sense of satisfaction and contentment.  Together, they will offer thanks and praise to God.

For a couple to maintain a healthy relationship, it is important for each spouse to have their own healthy relationships and interactions with friends.  Additionally, to build a strong marital relationship, each spouse must properly “leave” their parents (Genesis 2:24).  This leaving may require clearly and decisively cutting emotional and psychological ties with parents if those ties are harmful to the marriage.