“You are the man!”
“Then Nathan said to David, "You are the man! …”(2 Samuel 12:7).
When I look at myself, there are often things that I realize, even if belatedly. One of them, of course, is God's grace. Only after the fact do I realize God's guidance, help, provision, and so on. Another thing I realize, though belatedly, is that I spoke out of line. Especially after having conversations with someone, when I think about the content later, I realize that the conversation applies to me as well, but I spoke as if I were talking about someone else. For example, after a recent meeting with the presbytery, during dinner, I had a conversation with several pastors. I firmly shared my personal thought that when members of our church transfer from another church, they should at least get permission from their previous pastor, just as when pastors join a new presbytery, they bring a transfer letter. After reflecting on it, I realized that I had only done that once, yet I spoke as if it was something I always did. Furthermore, I regret saying, 'You all should do this, it's the right thing,' loud enough for the pastors to hear. I regretted saying it after realizing I hadn’t properly reflected on my own actions before speaking. And yet, I feel like I have said things like this countless times. When I realize, even if just a little bit late, I try to reflect on myself and remind myself to speak carefully next time, but I often end up repeating the same mistake.
Today's passage from 2 Samuel 12:7 is a verse we are quite familiar with. It recounts how David, after lying with Bathsheba, the wife of his loyal soldier Uriah (11:4), seemed to show no regard for his sin of adultery. When he heard that Bathsheba had conceived (v. 5), he devised a cunning plan to cover up his sin by making it appear that the child was Uriah's. According to Yoon Sun Park's commentary, David called Uriah back from the battlefield to the palace, urging him to go down to his house and rest, even sending food to him (v. 8). However, the loyal soldier Uriah did not go to his house but slept at the entrance of the palace with his master's servants (v. 9). David then devised a second cunning plan. He brought Uriah into his presence, made him eat and drink, and got him drunk, hoping that in his drunken state, Uriah would go down to his house (v. 13). Why did David go to such lengths, trying twice to send Uriah home? The reason was to make it seem as though the child conceived by Bathsheba was the result of her union with her husband Uriah, not with David. After all, in those days, there were no DNA tests to determine whether the child was David’s or Uriah’s. How could anyone have discerned whose child it was? However, as we know, Uriah once again did not go down to his house but lay on his bed among the servants of his lord (v. 13). In the end, David deliberately arranged for Uriah to be killed in battle (vv. 14-25). When David received news from the messenger sent by Joab that Uriah had died in the war, he told the messenger to relay this message to Joab: "Do not let this upset you; the sword devours one as well as another..." (v. 25). How could David intentionally and purposefully have one of his loyal soldiers killed and then say, "The sword devours one as well as another"? How could he speak so casually about a life he had taken? David's actions were evil in the eyes of the Lord (v. 27), so God sent the prophet Nathan to confront David with a parable about a rich man and a poor man in a city, exposing David's sin of taking Uriah's wife (12:1-4). At that time, David, filled with anger, declared to Nathan, "As surely as the Lord lives, the man who did this deserves to die!" (v. 5). In his efforts to conceal his sin upon sin, it seems David had even suppressed his own conscience to the point that he failed to recognize that he himself was the guilty man who deserved judgment. At that moment, the prophet Nathan rebuked David directly, saying, "You are the man..." (v. 7). What a shocking rebuke this must have been! David surely did not think of himself as the one deserving death, yet Nathan’s words, "You are the man," must have stunned him. When we fail to recognize our actions as sinful, and the holy God reveals them for what they are, doesn’t our conscience experience a similar shock? The one who truly deserves to die is me, yet I convince myself that it must be someone else. How blind is such ignorance of oneself! Without knowing his own sin or even his own standing, David, in his anger, declared, "The man who did this deserves to die." What do you think of such a statement, made out of the indignation of a man oblivious to his own guilt?
In May, I typically preach about family. On one occasion, during a sermon for Family Month, a church member came up to me afterward and said, "That was a message my wife really needed to hear." At that time, the focus of my message was likely on the passage, "Wives, submit to your husbands." I often find myself doing something similar. While listening to God's Word, instead of receiving it as His voice speaking directly to me, I think, "This is a message so-and-so needs to hear." Clearly, God was addressing me through His Word, but I perceived it as a message intended for someone else. This is especially true when I preach messages that confront sin. The Word of God, described as the sword of the Spirit, should pierce my own heart like a dagger. However, instead of letting its blade strike deeply into my heart, I subconsciously direct its cutting edge toward others, thinking, "This is a message for them, not me." What is the problem here? It is the result of failing to diligently examine myself in the holy mirror of God’s Word. When I neglect self-reflection and self-examination, I gradually stop recognizing sin as sin. Instead of confessing, “It is my sin,” I take the posture of, “It is that person’s sin,” as I listen to God’s voice. Even though I am the one who committed the sin, I perceive it as someone else’s wrongdoing. How prideful and sinful is such an attitude! When we sin and then try to cover it up, it seems that even the abundant grace God has given us becomes obscured in our hearts. In that prideful state, we fail to hear God’s rebuke meant for us. Covering up sin not only silences our conscience but also conceals grace and stops up our ears. How tragic it is to live in such a way! This is not how we are meant to live...
Relying on the sword of the Spirit,
James Kim
(With a heart that longs for the grace to honestly confess exposed sins and to truly repent)