Nail clippers

Thursday, July 24, 2014, lunch.

Today, I went to see Grandma Bong-hee Lim after a long time.

I went to her nursing home with our church's 34th anniversary gift nail clipper set.

But when I went into her room, she was sleeping on the bed (maybe she just closed her eyes).

I was going to put the chair in the room quietly next to the bed where she was lying.

But I guess she heard the sound, so she opened her eyes and greeted me warmly.

So I sat down with the chair next to the bed.

After I told Grandma Lim that I had brought a church gift, I showed her a set of nail clippers.

Then I told her that I wanted to cut her nails.

Although I knew that one of her daughters cut off the flesh around her nails twice while cutting her nails before,

and she bled, I wanted to cut her nails and I wasn’t afraid (?) to do so. 

After saying, 'I can cut it better, Grandma,' I cut off her left nails first.

Then again I smoothed her nails with another tool (I don't know what it's called).

At least cutting her left nails seemed successful.  But the problem was that while I was cutting her right nails,

I think I cut the flesh around her nails because her nails were thick and thus the nail clipper couldn’t fit well.

I thought Grandma Lim was a little surprised and hurt when I cut her flesh little bit.

So I told her I was very sorry.  I said to her boldly that I could cut her nails better than her daughter. 

But in the end I cut the flesh near her nails like her daughter. 

Nevertheless, Grandma Lim stood still despite my attempts to cut off the remaining four nails on the right.

I think maybe she was was still because she couldn't do anything right now.

Since the oxygen respirator was not in her nose and was placed on her forehead,

I asked her, 'Grandma, don't you have to wear this in your nose?' and she said ‘Yes.’   So I put it in her nose.

She seemed to be unable to do anything on her own now.  It seemed that she even forgot her own age.

When I ask her, 'Grandma, are you 92 years old?' and she said she doesn't know.

Seeing Grandma Lim getting weaker and weaker, I said to her, ‘Grandma, do you love the Lord?’

I already knew that she loves the Lord, loves our church, loves the retired pastor and his wife, etc.,

so I think it would be more accurate to say that “I said to her” than ‘I asked her’ a question.

After that, I told Grandma Lim about the memories of our Victory Presbyterian Church.

In particular, she remembered it well, so whenever I visited her,

I shared the memories I often shared with her.

She told me about her memory of diligently washing 4 pots of rice in the church kitchen with her hands.

Because of that, Grandma said that her fingers had become a little different.

Also, when I was a bachelor evangelist, I used to pick up Grandma Lim and her husband and brought them to church and then drove them home with the church van. 

I remembered her husband asked me when I would get married inside the church van. 

Since Grandma Lim still remembers that and asked me,

I told her that it's already been 17 years that I got married with a smile.

I was talking with her about these and other memories,

and then I talked to her about the late Grandma Young-hwa Kim (my biological grandmother) w

ho went to heaven already.  

The reason is because I know that Grandma Lim received a lot of love from the late Grandma Kim. 

So I am sure Grandma Lim will never forget her for the rest of her life.

I told Grandma Lim that if the Lord calls us to His heaven,

we will fall asleep (after the Bible says that the death of our saints is asleep)

and enter eternal heaven where there will be no more disease, pain, loneliness, and death. 

And I told Grandma Lim that we will also meet the late Grandma Kim,

 Grandpa Jong-hwan Lim (Grandma Lim’s husband).

And after saying that we would all live with the Lord forever,

I sang the hymn “Since Christ My Soul From Sin Set Free” to God and prayed for Grandma Lim.

Tears welled up in the corner of her left eye when I looked at her face after praying.

Grandma Bong-hee Lim, who said “thank you” three times in conversation with me today,

I kissed her on her forehead as I watched her grateful and peaceful image.

[2014. 7. 26.]