Denying Jesus instead of denying myself?

Peter, who set his mind not only God’s interests but man’s,

Supposed to deny himself , bear his own cross and follow Jesus (Mk. 8:33-34).

When Jesus was caught, Peter followed Him at a distance as far as the courtyard of the high priest,

and entered in, and he denied Jesus three times (Mt. 26:47-75).

The disciple who supposed to deny himself and follow Jesus actually denied Jesus.

I look back to see if I am doing it now.