Man's behavior that drives a woman crazy (3)
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‘Why doesn’t man stop walking and ask for directions?’ [Allan & Barbara Pease, "Why Men Lie & Why Women Cry"]
Imagine you are a woman and now you are sitting in the passenger seat of your husband’s car and he is driving. And it seems to you that your husband has got lost while he is driving towards the destination. So you ask him, 'Honey, are you okay?', 'Are we going right direction now?' Then your husband says, 'Yes. Okay ….’ But he doesn’t answer your question about whether or not your husband is going to the right direction now. So you wait for your husband thinking and hoping that he is going to the right direction. But even after 5 or 10 minutes you see that your husband cannot find the right direction. So you cannot wait anymore and ask him, 'Honey, are you lost? If so, let’s go ask a gas station in front of us.’ What do you think your husband's reaction will be? haha
The man doesn’t like to go to the gas station and ask for directions even he gets lost. So he tries to find his own way to the destination. Then, if he cannot find it, then he goes to the gas station, puts the gasoline in his car and asks a person who works there. Why does he do that? From a woman's point of view, it doesn’t make sense. She may think that if he has lost the way to the destination, he should go to a nearby gas station or something and ask someone who works there but why now after all these troubles. She may not understand why he has passed several gas stations already without stopping by and ask the people who work there. It would be frustrating for her. Maybe it will even make her go crazy. But here is what the woman needs to know about the man. It is that the man hates to admit that he has lost his way. It is same as admitting that his ability and sense of direction is terrible. It is because he is confessing his own incompetence in front of his wife (Pease).
But there seems to be an exception. It is our couple. I am not good at seeing a map. I don’t have good sense of direction at all. But my wife looks at the map well and had the sense of direction much better than me. So when I drive and go somewhere together with my wife, I ask her for a direction if I cannot find our way well. If she doesn’t’ know, then I will stop at a near gas station or shop and ask a worker for directions. I think my children know too that my wife knows directions better me. It’s because they saw me asking my wife for directions. Haha. Nevertheless, I understand why a man stops driving and doesn’t ask others for directions. The reason is because I don’t’ like my wife telling me go this way or that way when I know where I am going and how to get there. Although my wife is better at looking at the map and she may know how to get to a destiny faster, I don’t want her to tell me what to do since I know what I am doing and where I am going. I just want my wife to trust me and follow me. And even though I get lost, I want my wife to think that ‘I am sure he will take care of it’ and give me a sign of trust. Instead of telling me to go this way or that way, I want my wife to give me some time to figure it how to get to the destination. If she is too frustrated because of me, why not buying me a navigation on my birthday or something? Haha (This was before we have smartphone and GPS).