The differences between men and women
Differences between men and women (1)
‘A woman worries about the future until she meets her husband. A man does not worry about the future until he gets a wife." ["Why Men Lie & Why Women Cry"]
I think the above statement has a lot of meaning but I do not know all those meaning. Why do women worry about the future until they meet their husbands? I think it is because women are man-oriented. In Genesis 3:16, God says to the woman “I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.” Here we can see that women are husband-oriented. She has a desire to help and support her husband. Also she needs a man's rule. The woman is not ruling the man, but the man is. So the woman worries about the future until she meets the man who can control her. No matter how heroine the woman is, she needs to be ruled by the man. So a woman cannot help worrying about the future until she meets her husband. If the woman was task-oriented, the woman would not worry about the future until she met her husband. The man does not worry about the future until he gets the wife is because he is task-oriented. In Genesis 3:17 God said to Adam, “... Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat of it all the days of your life.” That is, the man is work-oriented. The man has to work. He must work with sweat and eat the product. So the man can work and live on his own. From the man's point of view, it seems that the concept of "getting" is stronger than the concept of "meeting" a woman. Of course, he sees a woman with a view to marriage, but I think even seeing the woman is work for him. So the man aims to get his woman and does not worry about the future because he is doing so with the solution-oriented. But after he got his woman which means after he has achieved his goal then he starts to worry about the future. In other words, after achieving the goal, the man seems to have no idea how to live with the woman. It seems he just think he should just live vaguely. So the man has to worry about the future if he does not have another high goal in living with the woman and share it with her.
Imagine that a man-oriented woman and a work-oriented man meet and live together by marriage. Since they are opposite sex and are different, how can they live together with these synergies? I personally try to get to know a woman. Of course I am trying to get to know my wife, but I am learning about the difference between men and women through books. I think we should study this too. The reason is because if we do not learn, we will be ignorant in approaching our woman. So I try to apply what I have learned from the books to my wife at home while learning about the woman. In other words, as I am learning about the woman and as my understanding of my wife becomes more and more increasing, I want to give my wife the space as a woman and want to accept my wife as she is. For example, even though my wife might seem to have strong and independent, but she relies on me, her husband. As I look at her, I try to understand her point of view and try to understand her. And as I try to satisfy her needs, I try to rule her. For example, I would rather listen to my wife when she expresses her feelings in our conversation and I try to express my feeling and communicate more truthfully to her. And she seems to be grateful. When I share my heart and feelings truthfully to her, my wife listens to me and she is pleased to know me. When I explain to her a reason why I did what I did, sometimes she shows tears of love because she understands my circumstances and my heart. And she hugs me. Indeed, my wife is also husband-oriented.