‘You excel still more’
[1 Thessalonians 4:1-8]
Have you ever heard the word “Me Too movement’? “Me Too movement” is a movement against sexual harassment and sexual assault. The movement began to spread virally in October 2017 as a hashtag on social media in an attempt to demonstrate the widespread prevalence of sexual assault and harassment, especially in the workplace. It followed sexual-abuse allegations against Harvey Weinstein (Internet).
Why are there so many people who suffer sexual violence? Why did the perpetrators commit sexual assault and rape against them? I think it is because of the unsatisfying lust in people. Look at Ezekiel 16:28-29: “You engaged in prostitution with the Assyrians too, because you were insatiable; and even after that, you still were not satisfied. Then you increased your promiscuity to include Babylonia, a land of merchants, but even with this you were not satisfied.” Of course, this is what the Lord said to the Israelites who had repeatedly been subjected to spiritual adultery through prophet Ezekiel. In the sight of God, the Israelites were committing the sins of spiritual adultery in which they relied more on Assyria and Babylon than God with their unsatisfying spiritual lust. But if we apply this word to this age, Satan stimulates a lustfulness that is not satisfying but is burning like the fire of greed in us (Prov. 19: 24-29) so that we may desire other person’s body beside our spouse’s and commit sexual sin against God. Especially now, Satan is persistently attacking the church leaders, tempting them to commit sexual immorality and sinning against God. Satan is not only hardening our hearts (Jer 9:14, Heb. 3:13), making our faces obstinate and stubborn (Jer. 6:28, Ezek. 2:4) and our hearts paralyze (1 Tim. 4:2) but also makes us to commit sins of fornication boldly both in front of other church brothers and sisters in Christ, and even before our families. Satan is making us to keep on sinning against God even after we get disciplined by God. Now Satan is making us not stop sinning with eyes full of adultery (2 Pet. 2:14). Satan is filling us with lust and greed in our hearts. What should we do? We must live a holy life according to God's will (1 Thess. 4:3). Then what should we do to live a holy life according to God's will? I want to think about the three things from 1 Thessalonians 4:1-8:
First, we must avoid sexual immorality and not pursue passionate lust in order to live the holy life according to God’s will.
Look at 1 Thessalonians 4:3, 5: “It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; … not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God.” Apostle Paul not only prayed for the beloved Thessalonian church saints to be holy in the presence of God and Father (3:13), but also he told them the will of God toward them is sanctification (4:3). He also told them that God had not called them for the purpose of impurity, but in sanctification (v. 7). Then Paul told them what they should do to live according to God’s calling and His will:
(1) It was to avoid sexual immorality.
Look at 1 Thessalonians 4:3 – “It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality.” In order to avoid sexual immorality, we must first forsake “a spirit of prostitution” in us (Hos. 5:4). The reason is because if we have the spirit of prostitution, then we don’t acknowledge the Lord (v. 4). If we don’t forsake the the spirit of prostitution in us, then we will see a woman with a lust [a lust of dissatisfaction (Prov. 27:20, 1 Jn. 2:16)], which is already committing adultery with the mind (Mt. 15:19). This is because there is covetousness in our hearts. And this covetousness in our hearts makes us to even covet our neighbor’s wife (Exod. 20:17) and to commit adultery in our hearts. We must also avoid sexual immorality (1 Thess. 4:3). The reason is because the spirit of prostitution doesn’t acknowledge the Lord (Hos. 5:4). Then, how can we forsake the act of sexual immorality? We must make a covenant with our eyes (Job 31: 1). The reason is because the lust of our eyes (1 Jn. 2:16) cannot never be satisfied (Prov. 27:20). With eyes full of adultery, they never stop sinning (2 Pet. 2:14). Rev. Lloyd Jones said in his book "Darkness and Light": ‘Your eyes are a problem. If you see something, your mind follows it. ... If there is something that makes you to be tempted, do not look at it! ... Don’t let your eyes covet that thing. Do not let yourself get away from looking straight ahead. … Make a covenant with your eyes and look straight ahead. Just look at holiness and heaven and walk toward the direction which the Lord directs you’ (Jones). We must keep in mind that our bodies aren’t meant for sexual immorality but for the Lord (1 Cor. 6:13). So we must flee from sexual immorality (v. 18). We must honor God with our bodies (v. 20) because our bodies aren’t ours but Christ's (v. 15). Shall we then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! (v. 15)
(2) It was not to follow passionate lust like unbelievers.
Look at 1 Thessalonians 4:5 – “not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God.” Have you ever heard of "SEVEN DEADLY SINS"? When I think about “SEVEN DEADLY SINS” it reminds me a movie "Seven"(1995). The film then featured famous actors such as Brad Pitt, Morgan Freeman and Kevin Spacese, and the plot of the film showed a series of murders with the motif of original sin. The theme of the film is that human cannot escape from the seven original sins such as, gluttony, greed, sloth, pride, lust, envy, and wrath (Internet). One of the seven sins mentioned here is "LUST". And lust is a disorderly desire for physical pleasure. This is what Proverbs 6:25 says: “Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes.” The reason is because if we lust in our hearts after “the immoral woman” (v. 24), “the prostitute” (v. 26), we will eventually go bankrupt and lose our lives (v. 26). How many men are now exploring the beauty of prostitutes and dating them and lost all of their wealth? Look at Proverbs 29:3 – “A man who loves wisdom brings joy to his father, but a companion of prostitutes squanders his wealth.” Then how can we not see the beauty of the prostitutes and not have passionate lust? Look at Proverbs 6:20-24: “My son, keep your father's commands and do not forsake your mother's teaching. Bind them upon your heart forever; fasten them around your neck. When you walk, they will guide you; when you sleep, they will watch over you; when you awake, they will speak to you. For these commands are a lamp, this teaching is a light, and the corrections of discipline are the way to life, keeping you from the immoral woman, from the smooth tongue of the wayward wife.” In order for us not to covet the beauty of the prostitutes, we must desire the word of God in our hearts. We must always keep God’s command and God’s law in our hearts and keep His words and do not leave them (Ref. 3:1-3; 7:1-3). The reason is because the Word of God will guide us, watch over us and will speak to us (6:22). In other words, because God's command is a lamp, it guides us, and because it is a light, it protects us from the forces of darkness. And it gives us "reproofs of instruction" (v. 23). Therefore, when we don’t leave God's command and God’s law but always keep it in our hearts, then it will keep us from falling into the words of the prostitutes. As we read 1 Thessalonians 4:5 already, Paul exhorted the Thessalonian church saints not to follow “passionate lust like the heathen who do not know God.” What does it mean? There are two meanings. The passive meaning is that unbelievers who don’t know God follow lust, but since you are believers in God you shouldn’t follow your passionate lust. In other words, the believers who know God should not follow passionate lust. The active meaning is that since the Thessalonian church saints are believers who know God, they must seek sanctification which is the will of God.
We have to work harder to live a holy life according to God's will. In order to do that, we must avoid sexual immorality and passionate lust. We must get rid of all of our adulterous hearts. We are the pure and clean church, the Bridegroom of Jesus Christ. Therefore, all of us must be Christians with pure heart. And we who are pure in heart should seek the purity of the flesh. No one can say, “I have kept my heart pure; I am clean and without sin” (Prov. 20:9). We who believes in Jesus and His blood on the cross believe that our sins are forgiven and that our hearts has been cleansed. And we try our best to keep ourselves clean from all the things that come from the heart that make us unclean such as “evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander (Mt. 15:18-19) and the acts of the sinful nature such as “sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like” (Gal. 5:19-21). This is our prayers to God: “Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me” (Ps. 51:10). And we keep our way pure by living according to His word (Ps. 119:9). We live our Christian life before our God whose eyes are too pure to look on evil (Hab. 1:13). We purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God (1 Cor. 7:1). We who are pure in heart experience the presence of God. “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God” (Mt. 5:8).
(1) Would you be free from your bur-den of sin There's pow'r in the Blood, pow'r in the Blood.
Would you o'er e-vil a vic-to-ry win There's won-der-ful pow'r in the Blood.
(2) Would you be free from your pas-sion and pride There's pow'r in the Blood, pow'r in the Blood.
Come for a cleans-ing to Cal-va-ry's tide. There's won-der-ful pow'r in the Blood.
(3) Would you be whit-er, much whit-er than snow There's pow'r in the Blood, pow'r in the Blood.
Sin stains are lost in its life-giv-ing flow. There's won-der-ful pow'r in the Blood.
(4) Would you do ser-vice for Je-sus your King There's pow'r in the Blood, pow'r in the Blood.
Would you live dai-ly His prais-es to sing There's won-der-ful pow'r in the Blood.
(chorus)
There is pow'r, pow'r, won-der-working pow'r In the blood of the Lamb.
There is pow'r pow'r won-der-working pow'r In the pre-cious blood of the Lamb.
[Hymn: “Would You be Free From Your Burden of Sin”]
Second, we must know how to possess our own spouse in sanctification and honor in order to live the holy life according to God’s will.
What do you think is a marriage life? How should the couple live their marriage life? I personally think that it is really hard for the couple live their marriage life faithfully to the end. It is not so easy for the couple to live together until the end without divorce. Especially, in this age of divorce due to the marital conflict and affair, we cannot but to struggle about what kind of marriage life we should live in the sight of God.
Why do you think people are having an affair? I meditated on the Word of God three times based on the three Bible verses concerning this question.
(1) Proverbs 5:8 – “Keep to a path far from her, do not go near the door of her house.”
This Bible verse tells us why a man has an affair with another woman. The reason is because he is not keeping himself far away from the woman he needs to stay away from. Here, the woman that the man should keep himself far away is “an adulteress” (v. 3). The reason is because if the man stays close to her, then “in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword” (v. 4). Of course, she won’t be like that at first. Who will continue to have an affair if he experiences “bitter as gall and sharp as a double-edged sword”? But what he doesn’t know is that only the bitterness and pain remain afterwards. Another reason to keep the woman away is that “lest you give your best strength to others and your years to one who is cruel, lest strangers feast on your wealth and your toil enrich another man's house” (vv. 9-10). In fact, we see and hear not only are those who have lost honor and riches due to the affair, but those who are even being killed. If he sleeps with another man’s wife (6:29), her husband will be jealous and be furious and he will show no mercy when he takes revenge (v. 34). “He will not accept any compensation; he will refuse the bribe, however great it is” (v. 35). What would a jealous husband do to a man who slept with his wife? Will he not you kill him? Aren’t these things actually happening? Another reason to keep the woman away is that if we get close to her our life will groan at the end of our life, when our flesh and body are spent (5:11). And this is what we are going to say: “You will say, "How I hated discipline! How my heart spurned correction! I would not obey my teachers or listen to my instructors. I have come to the brink of utter ruin in the midst of the whole assembly” (vv. 12-14). Actually, do those who have an affair listen if we rebuke them in love? Look at Proverbs 6:27-28: “Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned? Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched?” A man who sleeps with another woman is like a man who scoops fire into his lap. Although he may say that he loves her, but doesn’t know that it is destroying himself and his shame will never be wipe away (vv. 32-33).
(2) Ecclesiastes 7:7 – “Extortion turns a wise man into a fool, and a bribe corrupts the heart.”
What does “extortion” means? It means “the practice of obtaining something, especially money, through force or threats” (Internet). Then we do people commit extortion? It is because of their covetousness. The reason why there is affair is because of covetousness. Look at Exodus 20:17 – “You shall not covet your neighbor's house. You shall not covet your neighbor's wife, or his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.” God clearly commanded not to covet our neighbor’s wife, the reason why we covet her is because of the greed in us. And if we are greedy, we cannot always satisfied with our wives’ breasts (Prov. 5:19). Not only that, if we are greedy, we covet another woman. So we look at her as we are drawn by the lust of our eyes. And our ears start to hear what she says. Our eyes cannot be satisfied even though we look at many women (Eccle. 1:8). Greed does not know enough (Isa. 56:11). So Satan tempts us with the lustful desires of sinful nature and causes us to sin (2 Pet. 2:18). Satan makes us to covet other women.
(3) Colossians 3:13 –“ Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
Another reason why we are having an affair is because we don’t forgive each other. Even though the Scripture commands us to forgive each other as the Lord forgave us, we refuse to do so and thus are having an affair. To explain this more specifically, the greatest reason why couples do not forgive each other is because they don’t know the Lord has forgiven them. And because they don’t understand the Lord’s forgiveness, they don’t forgive each other. Not only that, the couple are dissatisfied with each other and their complaints are increasing. As a result, they don’t accept each other, and cannot tolerate each other. The couples who don’t tolerate each other are those who have already refused to forgive each other in their hearts. Because the couple refuses to forgive and tolerate each other had have many complaints toward each other, there is a high probability that the married couples will become interested in the other person than their spouse. There are many married couples who have experienced a lot of failures due to their immaturity and have chosen a comfortable way to let go of troubles and conflicts rather than struggle to resolve each other's problems and conflicts in the Lord. In the midst of this, rather than trying to keep the unity of the couple in the Lord, the couples who continue to defend themselves from each other and saying “I am right and you are wrong”, and their marital relationship gets worse and worse. So their perspective toward each other is pessimistic and living together as husband and wife is not too burdensome. Therefore, they are jealous of the other couple in comparison with other marriages, eventually fantasize their situation of escape their own situation and to get away from their own spouse and thus have an affair.
Look at 1 Thessalonians 4:4 – “that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor.” Apostle encouraged the Thessalonian church saints who were living a holy life already, to do more and more (v. 1) by avoiding sexual immorality (v. 3) and not following passionate lust (v. 5). Then he exhorted them to know how to possess their own vessel in sanctification and honor (v. 4). Good News Translation says “Each of you should know how to live with your wife in a holy and honorable way.” I personally think that this is very important. The reason is because when husbands know how to treat their wives with holiness and honor, then they will avoid sexual immorality and will not follow passionate lust. If the couple is living their married life with clean and respectful heart, will they give a glimpse of the temptation to commit adultery and lustful sin? Then what does it mean by possessing “his own vessel in sanctification and honor”? First, we, husbands, must treat our wives in “sanctification”. It means that the husbands should avoid sexual immorality and not follow passionate lust and treat their wives as they pursue God’s holiness. We must live a clean married life. In other words, we must live the holy married life. Can you imagine that we husbands first pursue a holy life with pure heart, and then our wives as well then what would be our married life? Would not it be more and more sanctified, more holy, and a cleaner married life? Also, we should treat our wives in “honor.” We should respect our spouse. .
If the married couple doesn’t have respect for each other, what would their marriage life be? For example, what if the wife disobeys God’s word and doesn’t respect her husband? There is a book that I read in our 10th wedding anniversary and it’s called "The Love She Most Desires & The Respect He Desperately Needs", written by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. When I was reading that book at that time, I received precious challenges and lessons. One of those challenges and lessons was that if a wife is not loved by her husband with the Lord’s love, she will not honor her husband, and a husband who is not respected by his wife will not love her with the Lord’s love (Crazy Cycle). That is why the husband must receive respect from his wife and the wife must receive the love from her husband. Then what does it mean by a husband live with his wife in honorable way? (GNT) I found the answer in 1 Corinthians 7:2-3: “But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.” Here, the word "duty" refers to sexual obligation. In other words, the married couple has sexual toward each other and they must be faithful to their duty in order to avoid sexual immorality. They should meet each other's sexual needs. This is their responsibility as well as their privilege and enjoyment. The fact that husbands and wives need to know is that in fulfilling our responsibilities to meet each other's sexual needs, we don’t have authority over our own bodies but our spouse does (v. 4). Among the saints of the Corinthian church at that time, there were some who had false belief in seeking physical purity. That false belief was ascetic that not being married and not having sexual intercourse is spiritually superior. So those who had this false belief avoided marital sex in their marital relationship. So they used separated bedrooms. The Bible says that the reason for using separated bedrooms is to devote themselves to prayer (v. 5). And this is for a time. And then they should come together “so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control” (v. 5). This is why the couple should join together. In the end, I think the husband should live with his wife in honorable way (1 Thess. 4:4) means he should honor her body and fulfill his sexual obligation to her. When a couple respects one another and honors each other's body and faithfully fulfills each other's sexual duties and satisfies each other's sexual needs, the couple can avoid sexual immorality and passionate lust.
In order for us to live a holy life according to God's will, we must work harder to live a marital life with a clean and respectful heart. When married couples seek the holiness of God and honor the Lord, who is the Lord of both husband and wife, the couple is not only glorifying God, but also pleasing God. In addition, the married couple should possess each other in sanctification and honor, pursue the purity of their hearts and bodies and fulfill the sexual obligation toward each other, and then they would be able to overcome the temptation of sexual immorality and passionate lust. In doing so, the married couple can live a holy life that pleases God.
Third, we must not steal other person’s wife in order to live the holy life according to God’s will.
How should we act when we have conflicts with what we want and what God says in the Bible? For example, in the Bible, God says that we should always be satisfied with wife of our youth (Prov. 5:18, 19). But what if we covet our neighbor’s wife? What must we do? We don’t even need to ask this question because we know the answer. We know that we shouldn’t covet our neighbor’s wife but be satisfied with our wives according to the Scripture. But the problem is that when there is conflict between what we want and what God says in the Bible, we don’t live according to what we say and believe. The Word of God is bound to collide with greed in us. At that moment our conscience tells us not to do as our greed desires, but we are determined to do what we want in our mind. In the end, we aren’t living according to what we believe and say. Our hypocrisy is being exposed. Nevertheless, if we say in front of our brothers and sisters in Christ, 'I live by the grace of God,' we are making God’s grace cheap.
When we look at Numbers 16, Korah son of Izhar, the son of Kohath, the son of Levi, and certain Reubenites--Dathan and Abiram, sons of Eliab, and On son of Peleth--became insolent and rose up against Moses. With them were 250 Israelite men, well-known community leaders who had been appointed members of the council” (vv. 1-2). This group of the opposition said to Moses and Aaron: “You have gone too far! The whole community is holy, every one of them, and the LORD is with them. Why then do you set yourselves above the LORD's assembly?” (v. 3). The reason why they opposed Moses and Aaron was because they envied the the priesthood of Aaron and his sons. The Levites coveted the priesthood (Park Yun-sun). Why did the Levites covet the priesthood of Aaron and his sons? The reason was because the Korah and the Levites regarded their duty small. Listen to what Moses said to the Levites: “Isn't it enough for you that the God of Israel has separated you from the rest of the Israelite community and brought you near himself to do the work at the LORD's tabernacle and to stand before the community and minister to them?” (v. 9) Nevertheless, the Levites’ duty wasn’t small, they considered it small and they coveted the priesthood of Aaron and his sons that seemed to be bigger to them. Despite the fact that each of their duties was valued and they had to fulfill their duties faithfully, the Levitic descendants went to far. Because they regarded their duty that God had given them as small and light, their thoughts, words from their mouths and their actions went too far in going against Moses and Aaron. If our thoughts go too far, then our action will go very far as well. We must be very careful not to think, speak and act too far.
Look at 1 Thessalonians 4:6 – “and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you.” What does it mean? It means that the Thessalonian church saints should not cross the bound of marriage and wrong their brothers and sisters in Christ in the church (BELIEVER'S BIBLE Commentary). How then did the Thessalonian church saints go beyond the bound of their marriages and wrong their church brethren? What was Paul thinking in his mind? He was thinking about stealing the wives of the other brethren in the church. That was why Paul exhorted the Thessalonian church saints to do more to live the holy life that pleased God and then not steal other brethrens’ wives within the church. It was Paul's warning to the brothers of the Thessalonian church not to wrong their brothers or to take advantage of them (v. 6). But if they would not take that warning, then the Lord would punish men for all such sins (v. 6).
How do you hear these words? Don’t you wonder how Christians can steal other brethren’s wife? But isn’t the reality that even in the church, a pastor is stealing a wife of the church brother? A Christian website says that there is a "pattern" in the sexual violence of a pastor, saying that sexual violence among church ministers and female church members is serious. It is an article that analyzes the repeated patterns and suggests preventive measures, and says that there are six patterns (Internet): (1) The first step is called victim selection. Accidentally, it doesn’t happen to anyone. In analysis, sexual violence cases in the church can be seen that the pastor and the victim usually shared some sympathy with each other on a one-to-one basis. Those survivors who suffered from sexual violence said that they opened up their hearts and shared everything to their pastors. (2) If the pastor chooses this approach, then the second step is to gain the victim's trust. (3) The third step is to start working to meet their needs. (4) And the pastor thinks that he has formed a trust relationship with the victim, the next step is to isolate the victim with the word 'secret between just you and I'. (5) Then, when the victim appears to be more likely to depend on the perpetrator, the fifth step is sexual contact begins. According to the lawyer Kim Jae-ryun who represents the survivors of sexual violence in the church said, ‘He does not start with the violent skin contact from the beginning. But he starts with the slight sexual contacts. As he repeats, he tells her ‘Once I kiss you, I will be fine.’ The victim responds “yes” to him, thinking that this is the last time. But it doesn’t stop there. The pastor calls out the victim with the words 'I love you so much', 'I cannot sleep, I am going crazy' and so on. (6) Finally, the sixth step is to conciliate or control the victim after a trust-based relationship becomes a sexual relationship. In this process, the pastor said he did it because he loved her and made excuses with the the Bible passages. There are many cases where the criminal behaviors are justified when the pastor mentions the Bible passages to those women who followed him based on their deeper devotion. And the victim says sexual violence such as rape but the perpetrator says ‘We were in love relationship.’ ‘The perpetrator says, ‘Even if you speaks to the church members, no one will help you’, ‘Everyone will think that you are lying’, ‘If your parents find out, they will be shock’, etc.. If this controlled situation continues, the victim will receive the bad influence mentally. Even though she is victim, she suffers from the guilty feeling that it is an accomplice, and, in severe case, she chooses to injure herself or cut off from this world.
We must to know who we are. So we must not go too far. We must not have sinful thoughts by coveting the other person’s spouse. We must never have these thoughts for too long so that our saying and action don’t go too far. What is the reason? This is what the Bible 1 Thessalonians 4:7 says: “For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life.” The reason is because God called us to to live a holy life.