The Heart and the Gift of Man

[Proverbs 18:14, 16]

Last Sunday, centered on Psalm 128, we learned that one of the blessings God gives to those who fear Him is the blessing of family. Here, the blessing of family refers to wife (or spouse) and children. In other words, God grants wife and children as blessings to those who fear Him. In Psalm 128:3, the Bible says, “Your children will be like olive shoots around your table.” Children are God’s blessings to us parents and the peace of our hearts. How thankful we are to enjoy joy and harmony as we sit around the table with our young children at home! However, if the children God has given us as blessings and gifts do not fear God but live sinfully by breaking His commandments, how much sorrow that causes in a parent’s heart! Especially if our children are children who shame their parents (Prov. 29:15), this becomes a great grief and wounds our spirit.

In today’s text, Proverbs 18:14 and 16, the wise King Solomon speaks about “the heart of a man” (v.14) and “the gift of a man” (v.16). Centered on these two verses, I want to meditate under the title “The Heart and the Gift of Man.” As we meditate, I pray that we hear the voice God wants to speak to us and obey so that we may enjoy the blessings God gives us.

First, I want us to think about “the heart of a man.”

Look at Proverbs 18:14:
“The human spirit can endure a sick body,
but who can bear a crushed spirit?”

Last Tuesday at early morning prayer, we thought about the woman who suffered from hemorrhaging for 12 years, as described in Mark 5:25-34. The Bible records that she suffered “many hardships” from “many doctors” and had spent all she had, yet without any healing; instead, her condition worsened. Can you imagine? If you and I had a rare disease, wouldn’t we try to find many doctors and spend much money on treatment (if we had the money)? But if nothing worked and our condition worsened, what would happen to our spirit? Wouldn’t we fall into despair and hopelessness?

In Proverbs 12:25, 15:13, and 17:22, King Solomon says:
“An anxious heart weighs a man down,
but a kind word cheers him up.” (12:25)
“A happy heart makes the face cheerful,
but heartache crushes the spirit.” (15:13)
“A cheerful heart is good medicine,
but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” (17:22)

Friends, anxiety in the heart not only causes us distress but also harms our spirit. Why is there anxiety in our heart? One reason is illness. If, like that woman with hemorrhaging, we suffer not for a day or two but for 12 years with illness and pain, our heart will be anxious and our spirit may be deeply discouraged. Especially if, like that woman, we have spent much money and seen many doctors with no improvement, and instead our illness worsens and we suffer greatly, our spirit can be broken and discouraged. At such times, what is more terrifying than the illness itself is losing hope in our hearts.

King Solomon says in Proverbs 18:14:
“The human spirit can endure a sick body,
but who can bear a crushed spirit?”

What does this mean? Here, ‘a crushed spirit’ means being disheartened and powerless in the face of adversity, illness, or difficulties (according to Park Yoon Sun). If our spirit is healthy, we can fight and overcome our illness, but if our spirit is crushed and discouraged (ill), we cannot overcome the disease.

An example is the typical emotional response following a cancer diagnosis. It is said that patients go through three stages:
(1) Initial reaction stage (within the first week): denial, disbelief, despair; some patients may make poor decisions about tests or treatments due to severe anxiety.
(2) Second stage: emotional turmoil; patients repeatedly think about cancer and death, suffering depression, anxiety, insomnia, concentration difficulties, and loss of appetite for 1–2 weeks, making daily life hard to maintain.
(3) Third stage: adaptation; patients accept diagnosis and treatment, find coping methods, and return to daily life.

During this process, common psychiatric issues include: 50–70% of cancer patients experience adjustment disorders with insomnia, anxiety, and depression related to cancer difficulties. Additionally, 10–20% suffer from treatable clinical depression, with symptoms such as low mood, reduced motivation, insomnia, loss of appetite, and multiple physical complaints. Other common issues include fear of death, anxiety about cancer recurrence and metastasis, fear of uncertain future, worry about upcoming changes and pain, and anxiety disorders characterized by excessive worry about minor physical changes. Rarely, patients may develop paranoid delusions, suspecting their family wishes for their death or that medical staff are deliberately administering wrong treatments.

Everyone, even if we face a disease like cancer or any kind of hardship and difficulty, we must not lose heart. Rather, we should trust God and keep peace and joy in our hearts.
Proverbs 15:13 says, “A happy heart makes the face cheerful...” and Proverbs 17:22 says, “A cheerful heart is good medicine.” Even if we fall ill, if we have joy in our hearts, we will want to fight against the disease. With this resolve, we must fight the disease.

There is a well-known American pastor named John Piper who wrote a book before his cancer surgery called “Don’t Waste Your Cancer,” and in it he says:
If we do not believe that our cancer was designed by God for us, we will waste our cancer.
… In 2 Corinthians 1:9, God’s design is clear:
“We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.”
What God designed is to deepen our love for Christ.
We do not win over cancer by dying.
Cancer wins when we do not value Christ.
Cancer is designed to destroy the desires of sin.
… Don’t think only about fighting cancer. Think about fighting cancer along with (your sin).
Cancer is a good opportunity to testify about Christ (Luke 21:12-13) (Piper).

Friends, let us hold firmly to the word in Exodus 15:26 and pray to God:
“He said, ‘If you listen carefully to the voice of the Lord your God and do what is right in his eyes, if you pay attention to his commands and keep all his decrees, I will not bring on you any of the diseases I brought on the Egyptians, for I am the Lord, who heals you.’”
If we listen to and obey God’s word, God will heal us.
Even if He does not heal, we can experience God’s great and deep love through our illness and offer Him praise and worship in gratitude.

Secondly, let us think about “a man’s gift.”

Look at today’s passage, Proverbs 18:16:
“A man’s gift makes room for him and brings him before the great.”

Here, “a man’s gift” does not refer to a bribe. From Proverbs 17:8 and 23, which we already meditated on, the Bible says:
“A bribe is like a magic stone in the eyes of the one who gives it; wherever he turns, he prospers.” (v.8)
“The wicked accepts a bribe in secret to pervert the course of justice.” (v.23)

What does this mean?
God does not accept bribes (Deuteronomy 10:17; 2 Chronicles 19:7), so His people must not accept bribes either.
The writer of Ecclesiastes says bribes destroy wisdom (Ecclesiastes 7:7), and judges were especially warned (2 Chronicles 19:7), because bribes ultimately distort justice (1 Samuel 8:3; Proverbs 17:23).
Therefore, Proverbs 15:27 says:
“Whoever is greedy for unjust gain troubles his own household, but he who hates bribes will live.”

In Proverbs 18:16, the “gift” Solomon speaks of is not a bribe but a gift we give to others.
An example is Genesis 32:20-21:
“Say to them, ‘Your servant Jacob is behind us.’ For he thought, ‘I will pacify him with the gift I am sending on ahead; afterward he may accept me.’”

When Jacob was returning to his homeland after about 20 years, he heard that his brother Esau was coming toward him with 400 men (v.6). He was very afraid and distressed (v.7), divided his group into two camps (v.7), prayed to God (vv.9-12), and prepared a gift from his possessions for Esau (v.13).

Why?
Look at Genesis 32:20 again:
“For he thought, ‘I will pacify him with the gift I am sending on ahead; afterward he may accept me.’”

Jacob intended to soothe his brother’s anger by giving the gift, hoping that when they met, Esau would accept him kindly.
Thinking about this story of Jacob, I recall Proverbs 21:14:
“A gift given in secret soothes anger, and a bribe concealed in the cloak pacifies great wrath.”

Solomon says a secret gift calms anger.
In the end, Jacob sought to calm his angry brother Esau by giving him the gift, trying to ease the anger that had built up for about 20 years.

How about you? Could you be angry at someone who gives you a gift, no matter how mad you are?

The wise King Solomon, the author of Proverbs, says in today’s passage, Proverbs 18:16, “A man’s gift makes room for him and brings him before great men.” In other words, a gift leads us before honorable people. One example is found in Genesis 43:11, where Jacob puts into vessels the good products of the land of Canaan—frankincense, honey, spices, myrrh, pistachio nuts, and almonds—and sends them as a gift to the governor of Egypt.

Also, in 1 Samuel 25:27, we see Abigail, the wise wife of Nabal, bringing gifts to David to prevent his revenge against Nabal, despite her anger. Thus, gifts lead one before those of high status.

Friends, do you know who the gift among all gifts is? The gift among gifts is God’s only begotten Son, Jesus, the Passover Lamb who was offered on the cross. Through Jesus, you and I can be led before the throne of God’s grace, who is glorious and honorable (Hebrews 4:16).

In other words, through Jesus—the gift among gifts—by His death and resurrection on the cross, we receive salvation by faith, which is God’s gift to us (Ephesians 2:8).

Moreover, following the gift of God’s grace given to us, we become His servants to proclaim the gospel of Jesus Christ (Ephesians 3:7).

To conclude this meditation, in Isaiah 38:16, we find the record of King Hezekiah of Judah who, after recovering from his illness, wrote:
“O Lord, by these things people live, and in all these is the life of my spirit. Oh, restore me to health and heal me!” (v. 9)

God loved Hezekiah’s soul (v. 17) and heard his prayer. God not only healed his illness but also cast all his sins behind His back (v. 17). In short, God saved Hezekiah (v. 20).

Dear friends, God loves you and me, and so He gave His only begotten Son on the cross to save the life of our spirit. He also gave us the gift of faith so that we might receive Jesus as our Savior and Lord. God has given us the gift of eternal life in Jesus Christ.

What should we do after receiving this amazing gift?
We must preach the gospel of Jesus Christ that gives life to the human spirit. Because the gospel is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes (Romans 1:16).

I pray that through this greatest gift of eternal life, the power of the gospel of Jesus Christ that gives life to the human spirit will be revealed in the gospel preaching of you and me.