The Tongue of the Wise

[Proverbs 15:1-7]

Everyone, have you ever heard the saying "You must control your tongue"? What does it mean? The expression "a three-inch tongue" refers to a tongue about 10 cm in length, meaning that even a small tongue can speak words that are life and death important. The tongue is small (as described by "three inches"), but the consequences of the words that come from it are immense. Look at what the Bible says in James 3:5: "So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. See how great a forest a little fire kindles!" The words that come from our tongue can bring immense wounds, frustration, disappointment, and curses for some, while for others, they bring hope, courage, and life. In some cases, even a careless word can lead someone to take their own life. So how much more important is the word that comes from us, as Christians who believe in Jesus? This is why the Bible in Proverbs 18:21 says: "Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit."

In today's passage, Proverbs 15:2, the Bible says: "The tongue of the wise makes knowledge appealing, but the mouth of fools pours out foolishness." Based on this verse, I would like to reflect on the title "The Tongue of the Wise" and consider two points to learn the lessons God wants to teach us today.

First, let's consider the mouth of a fool. I would like to reflect on three aspects:

First, the mouth of a fool speaks harsh words.

Look at the second part of Proverbs 15:1: "...harsh words stir up anger." As we read the Bible, we see examples of people speaking harsh words in the midst of anger. One example is King Saul of Israel, who, in his anger, spoke harshly to his son Jonathan. Look at 1 Samuel 20:30-31: "Saul's anger was kindled against Jonathan, and he said to him, 'You son of a perverse, rebellious woman! Do I not know that you have chosen the son of Jesse to your own shame and to the shame of your mother’s nakedness? As long as the son of Jesse lives on the earth, neither you nor your kingdom will be established. Now, send and bring him to me, for he shall surely die.'" How could Saul say such harsh words to his own son, calling him a "son of a perverse, rebellious woman"? How painful must those words have been for Jonathan? It is said that in the ancient Middle Eastern culture, insulting someone’s mother with words like these was an extreme display of hatred and anger (source: internet). In the end, King Saul, in his anger, spoke these harsh words to his son Jonathan.

In Proverbs 15:18, the Bible says: "A hot-tempered person stirs up strife, but the one who is slow to anger calms a dispute." What does this mean? It means that a person who gets angry quickly causes conflict. How do they do this? They cannot control their tongue in the midst of anger and speak recklessly—harsh words, words that wound others—which results in disputes. Meanwhile, the hot-tempered fool, though in the wrong, continues to argue and fight, thinking they are right (Park Yoon-sun). What lesson should we learn from this? It is that when we are angry, we should keep our mouths shut. In other words, when we are upset, we must exercise control over our words. The reason is that if we cannot control our anger, the words that come from our mouths may be harsh. And if we fail to control our anger and speak harsh words, the person hearing them can be deeply hurt, so we should be slow to speak when angry (James 1:19).

Secondly, the mouth of the fool pours out foolishness.

Let us look at the second part of Proverbs 15:2: “… the mouth of the fool pours out foolishness.” The literal meaning of the Hebrew word for “pours out” is “bubbles forth” (Walvoord). This same word appears in the second part of verse 28 in this chapter: “… the mouth of the wicked pours out evil.” In English, the word “gushes” is used, which means “to burst forth (liquid), to pour out suddenly, or to pour out emotions or praise without much sincerity” (Naver Dictionary). What does this mean? It means that, just like water bubbles up from a spring, the fool's mouth pours out foolishness like foam. In other words, the fool speaks a lot without thinking (Park Yoon-sun). Ultimately, the fool has no understanding of truth in his heart, so rather than thinking about and speaking the word of God, he speaks recklessly and without thought, pouring out various words haphazardly. And because the fool speaks thoughtlessly and a lot, he reveals what is inside of him to others (14:33). Not only does he reveal it, but the Bible says he spreads his foolishness as well (12:23). What is inside of him? It is his own foolishness. The fool reveals his own foolishness, and as stated in the second part of Proverbs 15:14, “The mouth of the fool enjoys pouring out foolishness.” What does this mean? It means the fool enjoys exposing his foolishness with his foolish mouth. How foolish is this? So, Proverbs 17:27-28 says: “He who restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a calm spirit is a man of understanding. Even a fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise; when he shuts his lips, he is considered prudent.” Isn’t that interesting? Even the fool is considered wise if he keeps silent. We need to learn to restrain our words. And we need to have knowledge. We need to know God and know the truth of His Word. Therefore, we need to think and speak based on truth. We should not just pour out words thoughtlessly, spreading our own foolishness.

Thirdly, the mouth of the fool hurts the hearts of others.

Now let’s look at the second part of Proverbs 15:4: “… a perverse tongue breaks the spirit.” The term "perverse" here refers not only to words that are false but also to words that cause distress and trouble to the listener (Park Yoon-sun). What does this mean? It means that the fool has a perverse tongue, and with it, he causes trouble for others, breaking their spirits (cf. 15:13; 17:22; 18:14). In particular, the fool, when angry, speaks harsh words recklessly and thus hurts the hearts of others. The problem is that the fool does not realize how much harm his words cause to the other person’s heart. Furthermore, when the fool is angry, he thinks only of himself, with no concern for how the other person might be hurt.

Last week, my two children had a disagreement, and while I was nearby, one of them called the other a “jerk.” In Korean, this term could be translated as “idiot.” When I heard this, I got upset and scolded the child. As a result, the child went to their room and cried. Later, I thought about why I was so angry and remembered that when I was in ninth grade, a black woman had called me “jerk” at school, and that word had hurt me. So, when my child used that word, I reacted sensitively. In a way, we often use words in our conversations without thinking because these words are commonly used. One such word is “you stupid” (like calling someone “dumb” or “foolish”), and the word “stupid” is frequently used in English. Additionally, nowadays, young people do not hesitate to use the “f-word” in their conversations. These words may not seem to hurt anyone, so people use them casually. But should we be using such words so easily? In Matthew 5:22, Jesus says: “But I say to you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment; again, anyone who says to his brother, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the court; and anyone who says, ‘You fool,’ will be in danger of the fire of hell.” Here, the word “Raca” translates to “blockhead” or “fool” (Kittel). This was considered an insult in that time. Jesus is warning that if we call someone “fool” or “stupid” in our anger, we risk hellfire. Reflecting on this, we should avoid using such words, especially if calling someone these names causes emotional harm to the other person. We must stop using words that hurt others’ hearts.

So, what is the tongue of the wise like? Let's consider four aspects:

First, the tongue of the wise calms the anger of others.

Let's look at the first half of Proverbs 15:1: “A gentle answer turns away wrath...” The wise do not become angry when others are angry. Rather, even if others are angry, the wise are slow to anger themselves (verse 18). In such a situation, the wise know how to deal with the person who is angry. It is by giving a gentle answer that calms their wrath. In other words, the wise person calms the anger of others with soft words. A good example of this is found in 1 Samuel 25:24-31. This example involves Abigail, the wise wife of Nabal, a man who repays good with evil (verse 21), is wicked (verse 25), and foolish (verse 25). David, angered by Nabal’s actions, had decided to destroy Nabal’s house, taking around 200 armed men with him (verse 13). As David was on his way to Nabal’s house, Abigail, hearing about the situation, prepared a large amount of food — 200 loaves of bread, two wineskins of wine, five slaughtered sheep, and other provisions — and put them on donkeys (verse 18). She sent the young men ahead (verse 19) and followed them herself. When she met David and his men (verse 20), she immediately got off her donkey, fell at David’s feet, and said: “My lord, let this iniquity be upon me, and let your servant speak in your ears, and hear the words of your servant. Please, do not let my lord regard this worthless man Nabal, for as his name is, so is he; Nabal is his name, and folly is with him. But I, your servant, did not see the young men of my lord whom you sent... Please forgive the trespass of your servant, for the Lord will certainly make for my lord a sure house, because my lord fights the battles of the Lord, and evil is not found in you throughout your days...” (1 Samuel 25:24-25, 28). After hearing Abigail’s wise words, David responded to her: “Blessed be the Lord God of Israel, who sent you this day to meet me. And blessed be your advice, and blessed are you, because you have kept me this day from coming to bloodshed and from avenging myself with my own hand. As the Lord God of Israel lives, who has kept me from hurting you, unless you had hurried and come to meet me, surely by morning light not one male would have been left to Nabal” (1 Samuel 25:32-34).

Proverbs 25:15 says: “By long forbearance, a ruler is persuaded, and a gentle tongue breaks the bone.” The wise approach an angry person with patience. They persuade the angry person with gentle words, calming their heart and anger. Furthermore, in Proverbs 16:14, it says that the tongue of the wise can even calm the anger of a king, who can be as fierce as a lion. How wise is the tongue of the wise! Shouldn’t our tongues be like that? May we all have the wisdom to calm the anger of others with gentle words.

Second, the tongue of the wise dispenses knowledge generously.

Look at the first part of Proverbs 15:2: “The tongue of the wise commends knowledge...” What does this mean? The tongue of the wise speaks well of the Word of God (Park Yoon-sun). In other words, the tongue of the wise speaks the Word of God, and in verse 7 of this chapter, the Bible says that the wise spread knowledge. The reason for this is that the eyes of the wise read the Word of God, their ears seek knowledge (18:15), and their lives are devoted to meditating on God’s Word day and night (Psalm 1:2). In other words, the wise person, who meditates on God’s Word day and night, has knowledge of it and speaks that knowledge wisely. This is in stark contrast to the lips of the foolish. The lips of the foolish, because they lack knowledge, spill out their foolishness and spread it (Proverbs 12:23), while the tongue of the wise spreads knowledge.

Proverbs 24:5 says: “A wise man is strong, yes, a man of knowledge increases strength.” Applying this verse to Proverbs 15:2, we can say that the tongue of the wise, who spreads knowledge well, is strong and increases strength. Ultimately, rather than physical strength, we should focus on growing the strength of our tongues by meditating on God’s Word day and night, continually growing in the knowledge of God and the knowledge of the truth. Therefore, we should wisely use our tongues to speak and spread the Word of God, as God gives us wisdom.

Third, the tongue of the wise heals wounds.

Let’s look at the first half of Proverbs 15:4: “The soothing tongue is a tree of life...” Here, the “soothing tongue” refers to a “healing tongue.” In other words, the lips of the fool speak harsh words, which wound the hearts of others, but the tongue of the wise heals those wounds. Wouldn't you like to have such a tongue? How exactly does the tongue of the wise heal wounds? It heals wounds by speaking God's Word well (verse 2). The wise speak God's Word in a gentle manner (a soft answer, verse 1) and use those gentle words to heal the wounded hearts of others. Dr. Park Yoon-sun speaks about this healing tongue, saying that it speaks words that are both truthful and peaceful, comforting the listener, giving life, and bringing hope. Such words are like “salt seasoned with grace” (Colossians 4:6) (Park Yoon-sun). The Bible describes the tongue of the wise as “a tree of life” because it comforts, revives, and gives hope to the listener (Proverbs 15:4). In other words, the tongue of the wise is a tree of life because it proclaims Jesus Christ, who is life, and heals dying souls.

Lastly, fourth, the tongue of the wise speaks the right words at the right time.

Look at Proverbs 15:23: “A man finds joy in giving an apt reply— and how good is a timely word!” Personally, when I meditate on this verse, I think about how beautiful it is to say the right words at the right time. And indeed, I often experience the Holy Spirit leading me to speak the right words at the right moment. For example, when I give counseling through internet chats, I often share Bible verses that the Holy Spirit brings to my mind, and I see how these words impact the other person’s heart. Sometimes I am surprised myself, because the words the Holy Spirit reminds me of are exactly what that person needed at that moment. So, personally, when I think of Proverbs 15:23, I believe that God gives us joy by making us speak His words at His time. Proverbs 25:11-12 says: “A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver. The wise rebuke, spoken in earshot of the listener, is like a golden ring or an ornament of fine gold.” What does this mean? It means that words of timely advice bear good fruit (Park Yoon-sun). The Hebrew word for “time” here means “wheel,” which refers to words being adjusted and turned according to the situation and circumstances. This teaches that the one offering advice must consider various factors when speaking to another (Park Yoon-sun). The one giving advice must speak with love and peace, not in an insulting manner. They must not speak hastily or rudely. When advice is given in this way and well received by the listener, it becomes a great honor for the one giving the advice (“apples of gold in settings of silver” and “a golden ring or an ornament of fine gold,” as the Bible says) (Park Yoon-sun). Do we, because of our love for others, receive advice from those around us as a great honor?

Brothers and sisters, when we speak the right words at the right time, sometimes the Holy Spirit may want us to give advice or even rebuke. In such cases, we must not withhold counsel or rebuke but speak God’s Word boldly. However, we must speak to the wise and not to the arrogant. The reason is that we may fear that the arrogant will hate us if we rebuke them. But if we rebuke the wise, they will love us (Proverbs 9:8).

Conclusion of the reflection:
James 3:2 says: “We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check.” In our effort to become perfect Christians who do not stumble in our speech, we have reflected on the lips of the fool and the tongue of the wise, focusing on Proverbs 15:1-7. We learned that the lips of the fool speak harsh words, spew foolishness, and wound the hearts of others. In contrast, the tongue of the wise calms anger, imparts knowledge, heals wounds, and speaks the right words at the right time. Is your tongue the tongue of the wise or the tongue of the fool?