We must feel complete insufficiency.

“The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.” (Psalm 23:1)

During the family and relatives gathering worship on January 2, 2006, the verse Psalm 23:1 came to my mind. This is because it was a favorite Bible verse of my grandmother, who has already gone to heaven.
As I meditated on this verse, the Holy Spirit gave me a revelation. That revelation is that we must deeply feel our insufficiency.
So I proclaim and pray to my own soul: “My soul, you, James, must thoroughly feel your own insufficiency!”

The sheep who have the Lord as their shepherd, who hear His voice and follow in obedience, lack nothing.
But if we all go “astray, each one turning to his own way” (Isaiah 53:6), we will have no choice but to confess:
“The Lord is my shepherd, but I have gone my own way, therefore I have insufficiencies.”

A perfect example is the prodigal son in Luke 15.
He left his father’s embrace and went his own way, living a reckless and wasteful life.
After having squandered everything, “a severe famine came in that land, and he began to be in need” (verse 14).
He was thoroughly experiencing insufficiency.
So the prodigal son said to himself: “How many of my father’s hired servants have plenty of bread, but I perish here with hunger!” (verse 17).

If we do not listen to the voice of the Lord but listen instead to the voice of Satan, the world, circumstances, or our own emotions, and disobey the Lord, we will surely feel and experience insufficiency.
We must feel it deeply.
Because if we do not deeply feel our insufficiency, we will not turn to the Lord, our Shepherd.
Just as one must be thoroughly in poverty to long for the abundant grace of the Lord, we must be thoroughly insufficient to find God’s fullness within that insufficiency.

As a pastor, from the New Year’s worship on January 1, 2006—or rather from before that, even at Christmas—I have felt my own insufficiency, which has been somewhat painful.
At the New Year’s worship in 2005, I began in bodily weakness and insufficiency, but in 2006, the insufficiency of my character and inner self became more exposed.
Therefore, I had no choice but to rely more on the Lord and to long more for the power of prayer, the power of the Holy Spirit, the power of the gospel (the Word), and the power of love.
However, I am still far from where I want to be.
I still have not thoroughly felt my own insufficiency.
Even though there may be pain, suffering, and anguish, I want to thoroughly feel my insufficiency.
Therefore, I earnestly pray to rely more and more on the Lord, our Shepherd, and to carry out my pastoral ministry without lack by obeying His will.

With a heart longing to feel thorough insufficiency,

Shared by Pastor James
(wishing to be satisfied only with the Lord, our one Shepherd)