“Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?”
“Some Pharisees came and tested him by asking, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?"” (Mark 10:2).
I am sure it’s not easy to get marry. But I think it’s much more difficult to keep that marriage. One of the reasons is because Satan keeps on trying to break a vow that a husband and a wife had made before God and their guests during their wedding service. And I am sure there are many ways that Satan is trying to break that vow such as, personality difference and money problem. But I think the deadliest of all is marital unfaithfulness. Don’t we know people around us who were unfaithful to their wife or husband? Aren’t there so many now? I was very surprised to hear from one of sister in Christ who told me that she had expected her future husband to have affair at least once when she marries him. Now it’s so prevalent that we are not surprised by people having affair with another woman or man outside of their marriage. As a result, we cannot deny the fact that divorce is keep on increasing. How should we view divorce? Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife? What does the Law of God says about divorce? Does the Word of God say it is lawful to get divorce?
When we look at Mark 10:2, we see some Pharisees came and tested Jesus by asking “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” At that time, there two schools of thought, one allowing divorce for virtually any reason, and the other denying divorce except on grounds of adultery. The Pharisees undoubtedly expected Jesus to take one side, in which case He would lose the support of the other faction (MacArthur). Jesus replied, “What did Moses command you?” (v.3). The Pharisees said “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away” (v.4). This was their misinterpretation of Deuteronomy 24:1-4. The Scripture did not say a man could send his wife away without any reasons. Rather, the Scripture said that when “he has found some indecency in her”, then the man could write her a certificate of divorce and send her out from his house. To these Pharisees who misunderstood Deuteronomy 24:1-4, Jesus said “It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law” (Mk. 10:5). In other words, a reason why the Law of Moses allowed a man to write the divorce certificate and then release his wife when he found in her an indecency (ex. Adultery) was because the Israelites’ hearts were hard in a way that they were lack in loving others, even their wives. But it wasn’t this way from the beginning (Mt. 19:8). At the beginning (v.4), the Creator made Adam and Eve (Mk. 10:6; Gen. 1:27, 5:2) and joined them together (v.9) and the two became one flesh (v.8; Gen. 2:24). So Jesus told the Pharisees that “what God has joined together, let man not separate (v.9). You see, God set a marriage between a man and a woman. He did not set a divorce between them. In fact God said in Malachi 2:16 that “I hate divorce.” Since God hates divorce, we must hate it too. We must hate marital unfaithfulness. We must hate adultery. We must hate to be captivated by another woman beside our beloved wives (cf. Prov. 5:20).
When we look at Matthew 19:9, Jesus said that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery. It seems like Jesus is allowing a man to divorce his wife when she has committed adultery. But when we think about what Jesus said in connection to what God told the prophet Hosea to do, that is to “God, take to yourself an adulterous wife and children of unfaithfulness”(Hos. 1:2), I think God’s plan is for a man to forgive his wife who has committed adultery and be reconciled with her. And like to Hosea, maybe God wants to teach us His heart toward His people who are committing spiritual adultery. So I think more than finding a reason to divorce, God wants us to be faithful to a vow that we made before God and before our guest during our marriage ceremony. Think about it. When Apostle Paul talked about a husband and a wife in Ephesus chapter 5, he was talking about Christ and the church (v.32). If the church commits spiritual adultery like the Israelites in Hosea’s time, does Christ divorce His church? If Jesus allows us to divorce our wives when they commit adultery, then shouldn’t Christ divorce His church when the church commits spiritual adultery? But as we know, Jesus will not and cannot divorce from His church because although we are faithless, He will remain faithful, “for He cannot deny Himself” (1 Tim. 2:13). Therefore, in God’s perspective it is unlawful for a man to divorce his wife. God the Father hates divorce (Mal. 2:16). God the Son will not and cannot divorce His church. God the Holy Spirit united a husband and a wife through the bond of peace (Eph. 4:3). Therefore, we must make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit between the husband and the wife.
As I recommit myself to keep the unity between Jane and I,
James Kim